Dealing With Financial Infidelity
In your previous reading about couples and money, we’ve talked about convincing your partner to change and the perspective of spender Vs. saver, but what will transpire when both partners agreed to be on the same page, yet one remains to sway away from the agreement.
Every relationship comes with rules. This may be socially imposed or rules agreed within your relationship. Breaking these set of rules may yield drastic consequences for the relationship.
At the same instance, breaking money rules may cause critical effects on your relationship. Most people may see poor spending with genuine treachery or infidelity. This can painful as it may feel being betrayed, disrespected and neglected.
What is Financial Infidelity?
If both of you are on a tight budget, financial infidelity occurs when one hinders to stick to it, spending more beyond what is on your budget. For instance, if you’ve determined to cut back on your expenses, buying something that is not on the list and going over your grocery budget may cause arguments.
Was it Just Honest Mistake?
Your partner open up saying “I just thought that those accessories I purchased yesterday turns out going over our agreed budget for apparels this month. However, I was thinking that we can…”
Though there’s a mistake in not sticking to the agreed budget, being vocal and suggesting a solution to cover it up may be tolerable. This instances though may be an easy fixed as your partner was able to perceived and offer certain solutions to compensate was was lost.
Were They Just Not Paying Attention?
You might be scrutinizing each category on your budget and found out that your partner spent beyond a moderate amount on one of the categories on the list. In this manner, do not conclude right away, its better that you open up and let your partner explain about it. Your partner might not be hiding anything if every transactions and spending is tracked.
In reality, one partner may normally be the spender while the other half is a saver. A person who is said to be a spender may have a hard time coping up with the changes and sticking to the budget, hence, it is important that he or she understands the rationale and purpose of your decision. Money talk between partners is a matter of how you frame your conversation to make it sound pleasing to the others.
Was This Wicked?
Spending is somehow a sort of defiance. It might be an act of resistance in which one person might be hesitant with the budget, or disappointed in the course of the relationship, resulting to respond in this manner.
This is perceived as childish and unhealthy. Having a comprehensive discussion regarding your budget as well as finding out any sections at which either of you may feel deprived of his or her needs.
In contrast, the saver normally tackles all the areas of budgeting, which makes the spender feel that they are restricted in terms of their financial needs. However, this shouldn’t be the case, both of you carry an equal share of responsibilities in managing your finances. Therefore, it is a must to talk it out in a positive perspective and discuss your common goals.
Is it Serious?
Spending beyond your budget can be an easy fixed. However, if your routine becomes an attitude and develops into a poor spending habits, this might not be easily fixed over time. Furthermore, the budget may be termed as a contract between you and your partner; hence, braking this contract can result in ruining your relationships and creating a gap. If circumstances may arise, you must settle peacefully as adults and professionals. Deriving and conversing about your personal finance goals is a must for your relationship to grow.
